This article brought me such comfort! I've been hard on myself all week because I haven't had enough energy to engage in new hobbies (cozy gaming) because the hot weather overstimulates me. so. much. This article was the helpful reminder I needed!
i recently quit my corporate job so am in a similar-ish boat - sans the job hunting. the three things that have been a bit dysregulating for me are:
1) slowing down and learning to decouple my worth from achievement + productivity
2) the lack of a "normal" routine
3) the infinite possibilities of each day that can cause decision paralysis and anxiety
but as you said, lots of data to be gleaned from our bodies. and no doubt that a job search in this market would throw another level of dysregulation on top.
I really needed to read this today! Thank you and I love the advice column, such a cool idea! Looking forward to reading more of these. I’ve had a bad spell of insomnia in part from demand pile up
Great post! It looks like the techniques I've learned to manage the variable energy levels of chronic illness have probably been helping me in terms of my nervous system as well. I love the idea of an advice column for a neurodivergent people! Clear explanations like this should make the neurodivergent experience more transparent.
There is definitely meaningful crossover between living with chronic pain or illness and the capacity limitations of neurodivergent nervous systems. I’m tempted to make myself a shirt or something with “Yesterday’s capacity is not today’s capacity” on it as a personal reminder 😅
Yeah, I wish nervous systems came with a readable meter. The hardest part of this can be believing ourselves and not gaslighting ourselves when we feel rough, and also not making our lives smaller than we have to when we have a bit more capacity. Balance is an art! BTW, have you heard about spoon theory? It comes from the chronic illness community, but I think it's equally valid when discussing neurodivergent energy levels. Maybe you could get a sticker with the capacity motto on it and stick it above your mirror for when you get up in the morning. :-) Your post reminded me to put a little more effort into evaluating my status each day, which I try to do after I've been awake for half an hour or so. If I do it too soon I'll decide I'm capable of nothing every day. (Lol)
I am familiar with spoon theory and it definitely applies to neurodivergent capacity limitations! So funny about evaluating too early- I constantly think that I can’t possibly have a productive day when I first wake up too and then realize later on that I was just still tired lol The processing never ends!
I've always joked that my brain gets up at 10 in the morning, and it has no interest whatsoever in what time my body gets up. (Lol) my husband and I are both neurodivergent and we have a huge amount of shared expressions to describe states of mind and experiences. Often when I wake up everything seems overwhelming; I even have trouble processing speech and if someone's too cheerful it makes my brain feel like it's melting. I will simply say to my husband, "this is too!" This originally came from saying that it was too hot in the summer, and then we were too lazy even to say the word hot, but it has expanded to mean that something is overwhelming in a way that causes sensory discomfort. My brain has a very slow boot sequence, so in the morning everything is too! (Lol) I may write a post about some of our funny household words because I think a few of them are really useful for describing different neurodivergent states of mind, but they're also amusing and probably relatable across neurotype's.
Loved the article! And an advice column is such a fun idea. Looking forward to reading more.
Thank you! I’m really excited about it and very much appreciate your interest as always 😊
This article brought me such comfort! I've been hard on myself all week because I haven't had enough energy to engage in new hobbies (cozy gaming) because the hot weather overstimulates me. so. much. This article was the helpful reminder I needed!
I’m so glad you found it helpful! Also, solidarity on the heat aversion- it absolutely ruins me.
Fantastic advice!
i recently quit my corporate job so am in a similar-ish boat - sans the job hunting. the three things that have been a bit dysregulating for me are:
1) slowing down and learning to decouple my worth from achievement + productivity
2) the lack of a "normal" routine
3) the infinite possibilities of each day that can cause decision paralysis and anxiety
but as you said, lots of data to be gleaned from our bodies. and no doubt that a job search in this market would throw another level of dysregulation on top.
PS - fun idea!
These are excellent insights! The change in routine alone can be so destabilizing.
I really needed to read this today! Thank you and I love the advice column, such a cool idea! Looking forward to reading more of these. I’ve had a bad spell of insomnia in part from demand pile up
The effect on sleep & relaxation is so real!
Great post! It looks like the techniques I've learned to manage the variable energy levels of chronic illness have probably been helping me in terms of my nervous system as well. I love the idea of an advice column for a neurodivergent people! Clear explanations like this should make the neurodivergent experience more transparent.
There is definitely meaningful crossover between living with chronic pain or illness and the capacity limitations of neurodivergent nervous systems. I’m tempted to make myself a shirt or something with “Yesterday’s capacity is not today’s capacity” on it as a personal reminder 😅
Yeah, I wish nervous systems came with a readable meter. The hardest part of this can be believing ourselves and not gaslighting ourselves when we feel rough, and also not making our lives smaller than we have to when we have a bit more capacity. Balance is an art! BTW, have you heard about spoon theory? It comes from the chronic illness community, but I think it's equally valid when discussing neurodivergent energy levels. Maybe you could get a sticker with the capacity motto on it and stick it above your mirror for when you get up in the morning. :-) Your post reminded me to put a little more effort into evaluating my status each day, which I try to do after I've been awake for half an hour or so. If I do it too soon I'll decide I'm capable of nothing every day. (Lol)
I am familiar with spoon theory and it definitely applies to neurodivergent capacity limitations! So funny about evaluating too early- I constantly think that I can’t possibly have a productive day when I first wake up too and then realize later on that I was just still tired lol The processing never ends!
I've always joked that my brain gets up at 10 in the morning, and it has no interest whatsoever in what time my body gets up. (Lol) my husband and I are both neurodivergent and we have a huge amount of shared expressions to describe states of mind and experiences. Often when I wake up everything seems overwhelming; I even have trouble processing speech and if someone's too cheerful it makes my brain feel like it's melting. I will simply say to my husband, "this is too!" This originally came from saying that it was too hot in the summer, and then we were too lazy even to say the word hot, but it has expanded to mean that something is overwhelming in a way that causes sensory discomfort. My brain has a very slow boot sequence, so in the morning everything is too! (Lol) I may write a post about some of our funny household words because I think a few of them are really useful for describing different neurodivergent states of mind, but they're also amusing and probably relatable across neurotype's.
This is exactly it.
What stands out to me is how consistently variable capacity gets misread as inconsistency.
When in reality, it’s a system responding accurately to changing load.
But because most environments assume stable output, any fluctuation gets interpreted as a problem in the person
instead of a signal about the conditions.
So people start managing perception instead of managing load.
And that’s where the real exhaustion compounds.
Capacity isn’t inconsistent.
It’s responsive.
What’s inconsistent is the assumption that output should stay stable
regardless of load.
Absolutely 100%
It’s interesting how quickly this shows up once you start tracking load instead of just behavior.
A lot of what gets labeled as inconsistency is actually really consistent once you can see the conditions it’s responding to.